What is wrong with me?
I pressed in for 51 days with Christ on a few different topics. I fasted 3 earthly loves for the last 12 of those days as The Holy Spirit had asked me because I am willing to do anything for break through and change in these areas. I firmly believe in the addage if you do the same thing, you won’t get different results. I wanted GOD to show me what that different, next step thing is.
I am frozen. I am scared. I am unsure. Instantly all these negative thoughts about myself come to the forefront of my brain. Even as I here them echo though I am saying “that is not true, that is just stupid.” But here they are. All still roaming in there.
I should be excited. I should be happy. I should be screaming from the rooftops.
Because Christ isn’t giving it to me on a silver plater. Receiving some of these good blessings requires me to lay down/give up ideas, feelings, and beliefs about myself and some situations that I am realizing are not truth.
Don’t get me wrong. I am expectant and excited at what might come out of this if I can take the first step.
I feel like Moses at the burning bush. I have every excuse in the book, but GOD ain’t buying it.